A new type of species?

Our project went in successfully over the weekend. All the overtime, late nights,and weekend work finally paid off. I came in to work on the Saturday to help with the implementation, by 10pm, all my work was done. Thats it, there was nothing else left for me to do. I felt great going hom, like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I slept in til about midday on Sunday, the first in quite a few weeks if not months. Feeling refreshed, I decided to do a mass baking session.

3 hours later, I had the worlds biggest tray of triple choc brownies and about 40+ coconut macaroons. To celebrate the end of the project, I bought all the baked goodies in to work and hid them until morning tea time. I sent an email out basically saying I had food at my desk, come one, come all. The minute my workmate received this, she said "Lets see how long it take the vultures to get here".

We sat at my desk and observed all the people around us. One by one, you see their heads pop up, some standing up in their pods like a bunch of Meerkats. Quite amusing actually. Until the bunch of Meerkats decended on my desk like a pack of Vultures. I pushed my chair back from my desk to make room for them. People started cutting the line whilst others managed to get a fistful of food. And just like that, they were all gone. The whole process took less than 3mins, with a few stragglers who didn't read their email, or the more vicious vultures coming back for seconds. It was like watching Animal Planet. Except that it was some new mutated species of Meerkat cross Vultures. All looking innocent at their desk, tap tap tapping away at their keyboard, and the mention of food, their heads pop up from their monitors and they sniff around, only to swoop in on the food and devour everything. I have decided to name them the Meertures.

Boy or Girl?

My sister in law just had an ultrasound the other day. And no just any ultrasound, but a new 3D type which gives a much clearer picture than the typical ultrasounds. She was quite lucky that the hospital was trialling it for 3 days, and her appointment happened to be on one of those 3 days! Look at it! My future nephew/niece. I can already see my brother's nose....... fuck. Lets hope noses magically shrink during birth.......

My sister in law knows whether its a boy or girl, and I can already hear the wheels grinding in my parents mind on how to get her to spill the bean without giving her a guilt trip. I just told them not to bother......although I might have a few "chats" with her in the meantime! hehehe So......boy or girl?

Responsibility vs seeing the world

It was my niece's birthday last week. I called her first thing in the morning on my way to work. Which would've been around 7am in Singapore. I must've called a tad early because my sister didn't answer her mobile. However, 30mins later, I got a call from my niece. Apparently she was so excited and happy to know that I called her on her birthday, she made my sister call me back before they had even brushed their teeth/had breakfast etc.

Now some of you may think I am biased towards my niece. Maybe I am. She is the only girl in the family. And with 5 nephews already, having a girl I can dress up and pamper is a nice change. I mean, I *could* theoretically paint my nephews nails, put butterfly clips in their hair and so forth.....but I don't think they would appreciate it, or the kids at school. Its not just because my niece is a girl that I absolutely adore her. Unlike her brothers or her cousins, she shows you affection ALL the time.

If you're unhappy, she would come over and sit next to you and hug you or ask you to play with her. Out of the blue, she would tell you that she loves you. Not because she wants to scam something out of you, but because she wants you to know that she loves you. This would always follow with a kiss. She has always been like that as long as I can remember. The one moment that sticks to me the most is in March 2004 when I was visiting her in Singapore. It was after her swimming lesson and I was helping her brother get changed. She runs up to me and tells me that she loves me. I could feel my heart melt then and there. She is one of the biggest sweet talkers you will ever meet. She is also one of the most mature people you will ever meet. Ever since she was a kid, she understood logic and would reason with you. Most people say to kids that they're not allowed to do so and so. Kids will do it out of fear of getting trouble. My niece was different. She would do as she's told, as long as it makes sense to her. "Because I say so" doesn't work with her, you need to explain to her WHY, and if she thinks its reasonable, she would listen. Otherwise she would negotiate.

I used to go to Singapore atleast once a year to visit them, and they would visit Sydney once a year. This means out of the 52weeks in a year, I usually see her for 2-6weeks. The past 2 times I did go to Singapore, I barely stayed with them. Last year was worse, I was in Singapore for less than 9 hours. I wanted ever spare minute of my holiday to be spent exploring Turkey, and Greece and the US! This year, I won't be making any trip to Singapore at all. I want to save all my leave for Italy in 2007. I was always counting on my sister visiting some time later this year. She had originally planned on coming next week. But with the price of fuel now days, the airport tax and excise etc, actually cost MORE than the ticket itself. The tickets to Sydney were $400, but the tax was close to $500. Thats almost $5000 oh airfares for the family.

I haven't mentioned it before, but my brother and sister in law are expecting their first baby later in the year. My sister will definately want to visit them in Shanghai as well. So it was a toss up between Sydney or Shanghai. Shanghai won. My sister knew I was disappointed that I'm not going to get to see the kids this year, so she invited me to shanghai. Next week. I was so tempted! So very very tempted! Not only have I not seen Shanghai, I am also dying for a holiday! But most of all, I get to see the kids. And my niece can tell me in person how much she loves me. But I want to see Italy. I want to see France, and Spain, and Germany, and England. I want to see the world!

My one regret in life is that I didn't take a year off after uni and travel the world. I guess back then all I cared about was going to Hong Kong, and China and maybe seeing Japan. I am going to blame this on Moishii. I was content with just travelling Asia. Until he invited me along to his round the world trip, which I couldn't afford and I didn't have the time to do. So I settled for Greece and Turkey. This sparked an uncontrollable obsession to see the rest of Turkey, and Greece. And whilst we're there, Italy and France and all the other countries I haven't been to!
To be honest, if I didn't buy my apartment literally 2 days before I left for my first holiday in Europe, I would've started saving the minute I got back and planned a trip all around Europe. But I came back, and I had a mortgage. I no longer had the choice to quit my job for a year and go travel. It is expensive taking these one month trips every year. It probably costs more to do one month every year than to take 6 months off and do everything in one go. I want to travel! I want to see the world! My sister always knew I had this side of me, and she was worried that its going to get out of control when I told her my plans about Italy.

The advice she gave me was not to spend all my hard earned money on holidays every year. But why not? Yes I know I should pay my mortgage off. I know I should save for my next property. I should invest my money in shares and start building a nest egg. But right now for me, all of that means nothing. I have an apartment. So what? I don't relive the moment that I signed the dotted line and became a home owner over and over again. I do, however, relive all my wonderful memories whilst overseas. It was only for a few weeks, but the memories have lasted so much longer. People think you should invest your money into something tangible. Something you can sell for a better profit in a few years time. But why don't people think about investing in your life experience? I don't want to wake up one day, being 65 and finding myself too old to enjoy a round the world trip. Yes, lots of people travel after they have retired, but they would've missed out so much!

They would've missed out on experiences like those that we had in Mykonos. Things like getting stranded in the middle of the freeway at night. Almost getting thrown over a cliff by a psychotic donkey. I think if I was to travel in my golden years, everything will be more.....calm. Or maybe if I just travelled with someone else who isn't a magnet for disaster. But either way, I wouldn't trade the memories I have for anything in the world right now. I want to travel and I want to see the world! But then deep down inside me, I know I can't. I have the responsibility of caring for my parents, and my grandma. I am a role model for my nephews and niece. I have a mortgage and I have a job. I asked my sister why can't I be selfish? I have from now, until I have a family. But then I already know that answer. Because I already have a family that I need to take care of. One side me wants be selfish and travel the world. The other side of my wants be at home being the responsible one, limiting all my travel to my brother and sister and my nephews and niece.

I really don't know what to do. I know quitting my job and travelling for a year is not an option. I know I should go visit my family that is scattered across the globe and spend time with the kids before they grow up. But right now, at this moment, I am choosing to be selfish.

Update: The truth is revealed

If your boyfriend was in hospital because he overdosed on Orange Juice, it would somehow indicate to you that this person has no understand of nutrition and health risks whatsoever. So LOGICALLY, if your boyfriend calls you at 1am at night, telling you he is hungry, you would just tell him that the doctor has put him on a strict diet and deal with it. LOGICALLY. But NO! Instead, you join in on the plot that would put James Bond to shame.

Moishii's brother was feeling "peckish" at 1am in the morning. So he calls his girlfried that lives 10mins drive away to bring him some food. Now, usually visiting hours end at 8pm and no one is allowed into the hospital. Moishii's brother, knowing this, decided to stand outside the Emergency Department at 1am in the morning to have a smoke. Its like, people who go to emergency are close to death anyway, what would a little passive smoking do? So whilst he was puffing away outside emergency, his girlfriend drives up and hands him 2 bread rolls and a medium sized jar of Vegemite. He then smuggles the food back into his room and ate the entire jar of vegemite with TWO breadrolls!

I know some people slather their vegemite on, but its TWO BREADROLLS! Apparently his brother was practically eating the vegemite with a spoon out of the jar! When Moishii's mother found out, she practically ripped the girlfriend's throat out!

To make matters worse, Moishii's mum baked a cake yesterday. Knowing that the girlfriend likes the cake, she took the cake to the hospital to pass it on to her. The GF wasn't there so she left it at the hospital so she can pick it up when she visits her BF. Moishii's brother, never one to learn, scoffed ALL THE CAKE.

They now have people watching him like a hawk to make sure he stops shoving everything down his throat! I thought Moishii was bad when it comes to dieting (Eating grilled fish but smothering it in tartare sauce), but god help his brother.

Update on the OJ overdosing, vegemite scoffing nut

Apparently my facts have been wrong. A NORMAL blood sugar level should be 5-6, NOT 10. Which meant when he overdosed on the 7L of juice, his blood sugar level was close to 10 TIMES the normal level! When his sugar level dropped back down to 10 and he thought he'd help himself by eating a whole jar of vegemite and therefore pushing it back up to 28, he was 5-6times over the normal level.

Apparently he's blood sugar level is now back down to 9 and the hospital is trying to maintain that level if not lower. As long as he stops shoving things down his throat, it just may work!

P.S. we're waiting for an update on the size of the jar of vegemite he scoffed and the number of breadrolls. An explanation on how he managed to smuggle a pantry and half a bakery into the hospital will be greatly appreciated.

P.P.S. I am waiting for Moishii to confirm if his nut of a brother had smuggled nutella into the jar of vegemite and therefore eating a jar of nutella instead of vegemite.

It puts a rose in every cheek

Vegemite. I hated it for 25 years of my life and I've suddenly become addicted to it. I've started slathering it on my toast and sandwiches and even cooking with it! I've tried to convince my parents to start eating because its healthy for you with all the vitamins etc etc. Its healthy like Orange Juice is healthy.......when consumed in moderation.

So Moishii's brother had a stroke of genuis the other day. Since he was cooped up in hospital after overdosing on Orange Juice and having his blood sugar levels sky rocket, he thought he'd help himself recover a little. His blood sugar had dropped from its 48 down back to 10, but that wasn't good enough. He managed to smuggled in a jar of vegemite AND breadrolls. At 1am in the morning, he ate it all. Everything. All the bread and the ENTIRE JAR OF VEGEMITE! What? You think the salt will help combat your sugar levels? Who the hell eats AN ENTIRE JAR OF VEGEMITE? IN ONE GO?? What possesses someone to do something like that???

"Oh...my blood sugar is high after drinking SEVEN LITRES of juice, maybe I should eat AN ENTIRE JAR OF VEGEMITE and use the salt to combat the sugar?"

Thanks to his little stunt, his blood sugar level has gone from the healthy 10, back up to a 28! Not as bad as his 48, but still 3 times the normal amount! God can only imagine what will happen if he smuggled a tray of baklava into the hospital! Or maybe a kg of chocolate? Why not just eat salt right out of a bag? WHO THE HELL EATS AN ENTIRE JAR OF VEGEMITE IN ONE SITTING COS THEY'RE FEELING PECKISH?????

Peckish is having a few crackers, maybe a slice of bread or piece of fruit. NOT A WHOLE FRICKIN JAR OF VEGEMITE AND BREADROLLS AT 1AM IN THE MORNING!! Where the hell did he even hide the damn things? Considering the robes they give you in hospitals, I don't even want to know where he hide the stuff so it was out of view!! Is there no one normal in your family Moishii???

Darwin Awards

Darwin Awards - "We salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who remove themselves from it in really stupid ways"

Now what would you award someone who was CLOSE to doing that? You know how you hear all those tragic stories of people getting hit by a bus, or a car flies off the roof of a 3 story car park and comes crashing down? What about those stories of people eating at some unhygenic restaurant and gets food poisoning? Frostbite? Heart attack? Stroke? Breaking a leg in 3 places in a freak football accident?

I got an SMS from Moishii on Saturday. I had called him earlier and he didn't answer his mobile, so I had expected the sms to be something along the lines of "I'm watching a movie, call you later". No. "Im at the hospital my brother overdosed on OJ. I'll call you later".

what the? OJ?

I quickly type a reply "OJ = Orange juice!?"

I didn't get a reply for awhile and I started to get a bit worried. I'm sure you can't overdose on OJ. OJ must be some sort of disease, condition or accident abbreviation. I get a call a bit later from Moishii. Basically this is what had happened:

Moishii's brother has been suffering from bronchitis for the past month and has been on antibiotics. For the past 2 weeks, he's been having a minimum of 2L of Orange Juice before bed hoping the extra vitamin C will help him. Just OJ, no water, no tea. Just OJ. On Friday, for some reason, Moishii's brother drank 4L of Apple juice and 3L of OJ. Thats 7L of juice! He was thinking all that juice was helping him recover! And he was always thirsty, thinking it was the antibiotics. So he just kept drinking juice. That is until Saturday when he found that his vision had started blurring. So they take him to the doctors and when he explained to the doctor what he's been doing, he doctor screamed out "OMG WE HAVE TO GET YOU TO A HOSPITAL BEFORE YOU GOING INTO A COMA!!!".

Apparently his juice drinking bought his blood sugar level from a normal 10 to 48. 48!!!!!!!!!!! Thats 5 times the frickin blood sugar level! I'm surprised it wasn't higher considering he had 7L of juice! SEVEN LITRES!!! YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE SEVEN LITRES OF WATER! He literally overdosed on Orange juice! How do you explain that to you friends?

"Hey whatcha up to?"
"Oh, I'm in hospital..."
"Hospital?? OMG!! WHAT HAPPENED?"
"I overdosed on orange juice"
"......."
"....."

Or maybe......

"Hey guess what happened to me on the weekend? I had a near death experience"
"Near death experience? What happened? Were you driving? In a fire?"
"No.....I overdosed on Orange Juice."
"......."
"....."

As Moishii was telling me this story over the phone, I practically bit my lips off from trying not to laugh. I was wrong to laugh! I tried not to laugh but it wasn't working, and Moishii knew it. Thats when he said "Go ahead, I've already had my laughing fit" and then I lost it. I laughed and laughed and cried and laughed and then laughed some more. I started to get hysterical and started screaming at Moishii

Me: "WHO THE HELL OVERDOSES ON ORANGE JUICE!?"
Him: "My brother obviously!!!"
Me: "Your family ain't normal are they?"
Him: "No."

Seriously. Who in their right mind overdoses on Orange Juice? And no wonder he was always thirsty! He was having a kilo of sugar a day! If you're thirsty, you have WATER! NOT JUICE! JUICE IS SUGAR AND SUGAR MAKES YOU THIRSTY!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA How Moishii managed to keep a straight face infront of the doctor I'll never understand...... HAHAHAAHAHHAHAHA I'm sorry. I'll stop laughing now.

....
......

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Control Freak?

Christine had emailed me this morning in response to my previous blog. Basically the gist of her email was:

- stop putting so much pressure on myself and start delegating the work

- start trusting your other team members to do their job

- its not my fault if a project doesn't work out

I know and agree to all of the above. We were chatting away, and the conclusion is that I am a control freak. Back at Access, we had a great routine between the fulltimers. Because we had worked together for so long and know each others strengths and weaknesses, we had developed a sort of trust and expectation of each other. Our strengths covered each others weaknesses. We were able to be given the most unrealistic deadline, and between the few of us, we would always egt the work done with the highest quality.

The only problem we had was when we had new people in the company. Unfortunately, a majority of the company was built of casual employees or contractors. That meant, either they would work once a month, or work a few weeks and then quit, and even worse, work for a few weeks, get sent to a clients office and come back 6months or even a year later. It became too hard to train people. We were also so short staffed at one stage, we hired every Tom, Dick and Harry who basically screwed up more than they did things right. There was a period where a few of us would stay back most nights cleaning up after their mess.

Recounting all of this to Christine, this is when I realised that I had found the root cause to me being a control freak. Although I would delegate the work, I would rarely ever feel comfortable enough about the quality of the work. Every report, every bug raised, I would check and I would correct it. I would try to explain to the person how it should be done correctly, but after repeating yourself 3 or 4 times, there's just no point. Many of my friends perceive me as a ballbreaker, especially when it comes to work. In fact, I am quite a softie underneath. I don't like yelling at people, I don't enjoy telling them off, and worst of all, I don't like getting people fired. There has only been 1-2 times where I had suggested to management that they need to let that person go.

So this is when I started taking on more tasks. Instead of training and explaining to people who don't want to listen, I would do it myself. Instead of training someone for a week who will get pulled into a clients office for a year, I would do it myself. And in the cases where there ARE people who are actually competent enough to do the work I would STILL do the work myself simply because I can do it in 1/2 the time. Its not that I don't want to delegate and share the workload, but sometimes its just faster to do it myself. And that way, I can guarantee that the quality of work.

This was like a little therapy session via email. I KNOW I need to share the workload and make it easier on myself. I KNOW its not my fault when things go wrong. I am trying to change my mentality that all the responsibility is on me. I have this fear that one day, I'm going to find out that I missed a tiny little thing and end up taking the whole system down. That is why when my manager offered to have 2 of my workmates help me with my current project, I thought it was a great opportunity for a fresh pair of eyes to look over my work. I got the all clear from them on Tuesday night. It was like a weight lifted off my shoulder. Since they have completed that section of the work, it meant that I can focus on the more critical side of the project.

I have been staying back most nights hoping that the project will finish on time. Today, at 2:30, I had printed out the last document and was ready to hand everything over to the Project Manager and give her the all clear. I was going to buy a coffee and a big box of desserts and celebrate with everyone because I am actually a few days ahead of schedule. Just as I was about to hand the documents over, I had a quick scan of the work completed and realised there was one more LITTLE section that my workmates didn't complete. I told them to leave it since it was close to 6pm on Tuesday and that I would finish it. Thinking its a quick 5min job, I thought I'd do that before I talked to the PM.

As I was going through the work, I can feel the blood draining from my face. They had missed something. Both of them. Multiple times. This could invalidate everything I had just done and signed off on. I didn't know whether to burst into tears or start chucking a tantrum. I have been working my butt off night after night including weekends for the past few weeks, slowly making progress. But if I had to redo everything from scratch, I'm pretty sure I would've thrown the biggest tantie and then burst into tears. Our whole team had a huge panic attack and started checking people's availability for the weekend etc etc. Luckily, going through the problem with my manager, she's happy if I just redid 1/10 of the work that we had expected to do.

The irony struck me like someone slamming my face with a pan. The day I realised that I am a control freak and decided to start trusting other people to do my work and share my workload, is the same day where all my fears came true. The very reason why I take on so much work and put so much pressure on myself reared its ugly head today. There is a reason why I put so much pressure on myself. There is a reason why I take on so much extra work. There is a reason I am the way I am. And I am a control freak...and I'm proud of it.

Saving the world

I have a problem. I think I can save the world. Ok maybe not. But I believe I can save any project I work on. Some may think its a good thing. Its about the determination and drive. Something people think that I am reaching for the impossible and I need to be more realistic. Maybe I thrive under pressure. Maybe I'm just lazy and always procrastinate until the last minute and churn out the work under pressure. I take things personally when a project doesn't go well. I remember there were times where I would lose sleep and toss and turn all night thinking about things that could have gone different on a project. I have a million and one "what ifs" running through my head.

What if I had approached the project differently?
What if I had raised this issue earlier?
What if I had said no to doing this type of work?
What if I started doing overtime earlier?
What if?

I could keep going on for hours. I know I shouldn't dwell on the past, but I do. I still plough on ahead and try to finish the work on schedule, but if there is downtime, its "what if" time. I know when I need to push back on a project. I know when to escalate an issue. I know how to demand what I want. I know its not my fault that projects don't go according to plan. Its a known issue that alot of projects fail. But I still hold onto the belief that if I work hard enough, I can bring a project back on track.

I remember one project I had worked on where my hours were horrendous. My average day was 10-12hours with no lunch break. Everyone would have left and I would be the only one still in the office working to the hum of the vacum cleaner. Even they would sometimes go home before I do. We met the daily quota of the work that had to be done. On the reports, it looked great! We were meeting our deadlines and the project was progressing nicely. This was until someone pointed out to me that the only reason the project is meeting their deadlines, was all the extra hours I was putting in. But thats fine right? We were behind schedule cos the work we got was absolutely crap and therefore slowing us down. Hence I worked extra hours to try and catch up. Well, not really that someone pointed out. A project estimate is based on an 8hr working day. The goals we set are based on a estimate of how much we can do in 8 hours. The fact that I had to work 10-12hours to meet that deadline meant that there was something wrong with the project and we should reassess the plan and go back to the client. I was meeting the targets daily, but I was racking up the hours and therefore charging them extra. I guess back in my old job, that mattered. Thats why in the 3 years I was there, I hardly did any overtime. If I did overtime, we charge the client.

None of that matters anymore. I'm a permanent employee here, and all the work is internal. If I work extra hours, it costs them nothing. I don't have to worry about racking up a bill and going overbudget. Maybe thats why I am staying back more and doing the extra hours. Its my way to save the project and deliver on time. The whole "if you have to work extra hours to make the deadline, theres something wrong with the project" doesn't make a difference. We all knew that its behind. If my work isn't finished, the project doesn't go in. I know its not my fault. They were a week behind in delivering so I was a week behind in starting. Yet I still feel that if the project gets delayed, its MY FAULT.

I know I shouldn't blame myself, but I do. At the end of the day the work gets done, and all of my projects have finished on time. But I need to prepare myself for the day that it won't. I need to prepare myself for the day that I have to tell my manager that the work wasn't finished on time and the project is going to be delayed. I hope that when that day comes, it won't be because I have slacked off or stuffed up. I hope that it was something out of my control. But does it really matter in the end? I'll still feel like I've failed, regardless if it was my fault or not. Maybe I just need to learn that I can't save the world all the time.

Envelope day

Weeeeee!! Today is the day the company announces their results, but its also the day that we get "The Envelope". Whats "The Envelope"? Thats our bonus/payrise/promotion notification. I got told verbally what it would be last week, and I've got it in writing today! MauhaAUah!!! HEaheaHE!!! AHAAHAHa!! WEeeeeeee!!

Stress relief

Saturday mornings are usually reserved for sleeping in and curing a hangover from Friday night drinks. Yesterday I spent Saturday morning at work. To help matters along, the air conditioning was down due to maintence. Not as bad as the middle of summer, but still bad enough to give you head spins cos of the heat. Luckily it got turned back on at midday to cater for the many people working on weekends in our company.

Work has become so much more hectic in the past week. I have been cruising along in the project for the past month until BAM! Late nights, panic attacks by everyone in the project and now weekend work. Not that I have been slacking off for the past month. They haven't been able to finish their work in order to pass it on to me earlier. Now I'm the final barrier between them and the project going live. Basically, if I don't get MY work done by the end of next week, the whole projects not going in for atleast another month. My original 3-4 weeks to do the work has been compressed to 2 weeks. No wonder I've been having weird dreams lately. E.g. I was Frodo in LOTR trying to carry The Ring to Mount Doom. Or that I was fighting a current trying to pull me into the ocean.

Obviously I'm starting to get stressed. But I've had worse before and I always come out fighting. Still, I have ny panic attacks and sleepless nights even though I know things will work out fine. If it wasn't Mothers Day today I would be at work right now. If I knew things would get so bad, I wouldn't have agreed to go out with Moishii last night. I was tired, hungry and stressed.....and I was cranky. I somehow got conned into going to the 2day FM Lowie's 21st Birthday Party thing at Luna Park. We arrive to see a hugeeeeeee queue that went from one side of Luna Park all the way to the entrance. I was ready to turn and leave, but I didn't want Moishii to be disappointed. So we waited. And waited. We finally got into the Big Top where the party was held.

Oh my freakin god its a room of Teeny boppers. Did we used to act like that? I'm pretty sure we didn't.....the only time we did anything that ridiculous was during the Moulin Rouge premier where Sarah Michelle Gellar was appearing and I went NUTS and ended up on the news on every single channel. But I'm pretty sure I wasn't as bad as these teeny boppers with the screaming and the waving and the running around like a rat on speed. We usually rock up to these events, take a photo, sometimes get an autograph and leave. We never try to chat with the celebrities. Mainly cos the conversations will always be so fake. And probably cos we can't be bothered.

Paulini was performing as we walked in, so we did the usual, grab our camera and take a photo. We didn't even really bother moving to the front of the stage. For those who know me and have been stalking with me, if I wanted to get to the front of the queue, I WILL get to the front of the queue. Paulini's performance ended after 1-2 songs so we roam around and found the autograph table. They had a few dudes and a chick there signing autographs. I have no idea who they were. I couldn't even be bothered taking a photo. A 12yr old kid was running around screaming "WHO IS SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS!?!?!". No one could answer him. He came running up to me and my answer? "F***ed if I know."

I was getting annoyed and dragged Moishii to sit outside so I could whinge about how tired I was, how shit these events are and why the hell are we still here? We agreed to stay for a SHORT little while and then get the hell out of there. Fine. Ricky Lee was performing next and Moishii wanted a good photo. So of course, we started edging towards the stage. Ricky Lee performed, we got a few good shots as we edged closer towards the stage. Since we were in such a prime location, we decided to stay for another 1/2hr to see who else was performing. They had some guy with some other guy and a DJ performing. I didn't really bother paying attention. Things were relatively calm until Lee Harding came out. The teeny boppers around me went NUTS. They were waving and mosh-pitting, throwing things onto the stage and worst of all, screaming in my ear whilst jostling me around.

Lee finished performing and he headed off towards the autograph table. The Teeny boppers infront of me knew that. Thats when it happened. The Teeny bopper #1 infront of me turned and PHYSICALLY SHOVED ME to try and get me out of the way so they could run to the autograph table. I managed to ram her to one side using my shoulder as self defence. That little tart thought she could shove her way past me! The nerve! And THEN, HER little Teeny Bopper friend #2 thought SHE could SHOVE me out of the way. And then I snapped. The minute TB#2 shoved me, I grabbed both of her arms, pinned them to the side of her body, lifted her up and threw her backwards into the crowd. The shocked look on her face was absolutely priceless! I couldn't have gotten a better reaction if I slapped her across the face. That little bitch thought she could shove me out of the way. No one shoves me. EVER. Especially not for some punk of a Lee Harding. And its not a clubbing "I need to shove my way through the crowd to get to the bar" shove. It was a full on "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY" shove. It wasn't a "nudge someone with your shoulder/elbow/bag and try to get through". It was a "put both your hands on the persons shoulder and shove them out of the way" shove. Clubbing shove I can take cos I shove back. Nudging me with your elbow to get through I can take cos I'll just nudge you back. But laying your teeny bopper "omg I wanna jump Lee Harding" hands on me and SHOVING me I won't take. Ever.

After TB#2 recovered from her shock, she took a different route to shove her way out. But her bunch of Teeny Bopper friends behind her didn't learn. They started charging through the crowd like a bull on speed. The few stupid enough to try and shove me copped either an elbow or a shoulder to their chest if noit a good ram with my shoulder. The whole time I'm trying not to get run over by a bunch of horny Teeny Boppers, Moishii was standing behind me pissing himself laughing. He witnessed the whole event and he couldn't stop himself from laughing. His laughing fit went on for a good 15mins whilst I was battling another Teeny Bopper next to me who tried to force herself infront of me to get closer to the stage. She was practically leaning her full entire body on me. This is when I full force elbowed her. And everytime she started leaning on me again, I would elbow her and ram it right into her back. Its not like she didn't have room on the other side, but she wanted to stand where I was standing. To top it off, she had a friend wearing a coat that make the Yeti look well groomed. I've never seen a hairier jacket. Ever. You could get a Big Ted costume and you still won't look as hairy. She was holding onto a glass of wine and swinging it around and sloshing it all over the people infront of her hoping they would relinquish their spot at the very front of the stage. That ain't happening. So here we were, at the front of the stage with a hairy Teeny Bopper throwing alcohol on everyone, another Teeny Bopper next to me practically rubbing herself all over me and then there was a 40 year old woman.

Well, she wasn't a 40 year old woman. She was actually closer to 15. But she was dressed in her nanna's clothes. With a short bob hair cut. And Granny glasses. And Pearls. And so much make up it'll put a drag queen to shame. Now I know why we used to come to these things. It wasn't the celebrities. Ok, sometimes it was the celebrities. But we usually grab a photo and an autograph and end it. No. It was the freaks. For some reason, these events always attract the freaks. THAT'S what makes all these events memorable. Its been so long that I've forgotten the purpose to these events. Let me name a few of the freaks we've met:

- Kylie and her mum
- The fugitive stalking guy who followed me around Centrepoint and Burwood
- The BF and GF rocked up to a Russell Crowe movie premier early to get a spot at the barricade, but then didn't like people jostling behind them
- The heckler who shows up to every single movie premier with his album of movie posters he wants them to sign despite him mocking every single celebrity he's ever met









As we left the party, I felt refreshed. I was stressed and tired and cranky before, but after that whole incident, I felt awake and full of energy. So it takes throwing a complete stranger across the room to make me feel better....hmmm....

We were going to grab a quick dinner and go home, but after that, we drove to Leichardt and found a table at the Galetta Bar. We ordered a wood fired pizza each whilst eyeing the dessert menu. As we were waiting for the food, our discussion kept going back to the freaks for the night. That is when Moishii wanted to set up a protocol when and if I ever get into a catfight. (Basically our Italian teacher told us when she was in Milan, a guy came up to her and started kissing her out of no where. No chatting or dancing. He went straight to the kissing. When she rejected him, he slapped her and called her a whore. We both know if it was me in at situation, I would probably rip the guy's nuts off). Moishii's question was "If you were in a fight, am I expected to film it, or break it apart?".

That has GOT to be the most stupid question ever. I mean seriously. Isn't that answer obvious????? If I'm winning, keep filming. If I'm losing, break it up. Duh! But then there was the question of what should be do if neither of us were winning? He plan is he's gonna grab a random chick and throw her into the fight and one of the following will happen:

1. Either she would gang up with the other chick to beat me up, and I will lose, so Moishii will step in to break up the fight
2. Either we gang up on the other chick, and I win, so Moishii will keep filming
3. Both me and the other chick will beat up the new chick so neither of us are winning or losing and Moishii can keep filming.

Now that we've got the rule straight, we turned our focus to the food. Throwing someone across the room really works up an appetite.

First up:

Italian bread with Balsamic Vinegar and Olive oil as an appetiser

Vegetarian Supreme with Salsa, capsicum, Mushrooms, artichokes & eggplant

Napolitana pizza with Salsa, Olives, anchovies and Mushrooms

Usually we would be stuffed by now, but laughing takes alot out of you. We need some sugar to replenish our energy.

Flourless chocolate and hazelnut Torte

Passionfruit Creme Brulee with a Passionfruit sauce

MmMMmmMMmMmMMMmmm That Passionfruit sauce was absolutely orgasmic! I'm definately bringing my parents here to try the food out! Of course, the evening wouldn't be complete with a nice Latte!

Absolutely Giddy!

Tuesday is the day. If all goes well, I'll be giggling like a school girl infront of her crush with a bit of hysteria thrown in. Ok.....maybe ALOT of hysteria thrown in.... Possibly bordering on laughing like a maniac.....but to put it simply....I'm going to be absolutely giddy with happiness!

Quick comfort meal

What do you do when you're hungry and digging through the freezer only to reveal a piece of frozen fish and leftover fetta?

You turn it into a mouthwatering dish of course!!

Snapper Pasta served with crumbled marinated feta cheese

It was absolutely scrumptious even if I say so myself! The fish was a tad dry, but leaving fish in the freezer for about 3months tends to do that to fish. But the fetta. Oh my god the FETTA! Parmesan would've overpowered the fish, but the fetta! It melts in your mouth and gives it a soft creamy texture which contrasts with the firm fish and al denta pasta! I'm definately making this dish again......before I eat all the fetta!

Bruise Update

Thought I'd post a picture of the spectacular bruise I got from the attempted blood donation...

The photo does not do the bruise justice...

Day 3 of the bruise

Yep... Fairytale ending...

The wedding was absolutely beautiful. I don't cry at weddings.... well..... ok. Maybe at my brother's wedding. And I was SO CLOSE to bursting into tears at Euan and Selena's wedding, especially when the minister started explaining that no money can buy the love that is between the two of them. And no matter what amount of money you offer, you will only cheapen the love between them as their love is priceless.

The ceremony had live musicians playing the piano, guitar and violin. The music alone almost brought us to tears. Selena looked absolutely gorgeous and I was so proud of Little Euan for not fainting! He really has grown up! It was a beautiful and truely touching ceremony.





I took some great shots of "The Kiss" but I won't post them. :)

I didn't bring my camera to the reception since:

1. It didn't fit into my bag
2. It didn't fit into my bag.....

So yeah.....the only photos I took was of the food which was quite nice and I'm going to attempt to make them in my spare time. The highlight of the reception had to be the Bridal Waltz. The music starts playing after a small hiccup where the wrong song was played. We then heard 2 beautiful voices trailing out of the speakers. It took us a few moments to realise that it was actuall Euan and Selena's voice! They had prerecordered their own wedding song! They were SINGING THEIR OWN SONG! Wow! We were definately impressed. Even more so when Euan spoke at the end of the dance and his voice came over the speaker. This is when I realised that they had been singing LIVE! Like OMFG! Talk about impressed! The only thing that could top that is if they wrote their own song.

*Cheers* To a happy, long and blissful marriage.