Darwin Awards
Darwin Awards - "We salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who remove themselves from it in really stupid ways"
Now what would you award someone who was CLOSE to doing that? You know how you hear all those tragic stories of people getting hit by a bus, or a car flies off the roof of a 3 story car park and comes crashing down? What about those stories of people eating at some unhygenic restaurant and gets food poisoning? Frostbite? Heart attack? Stroke? Breaking a leg in 3 places in a freak football accident?
I got an SMS from Moishii on Saturday. I had called him earlier and he didn't answer his mobile, so I had expected the sms to be something along the lines of "I'm watching a movie, call you later". No. "Im at the hospital my brother overdosed on OJ. I'll call you later".
what the? OJ?
I quickly type a reply "OJ = Orange juice!?"
I didn't get a reply for awhile and I started to get a bit worried. I'm sure you can't overdose on OJ. OJ must be some sort of disease, condition or accident abbreviation. I get a call a bit later from Moishii. Basically this is what had happened:
Moishii's brother has been suffering from bronchitis for the past month and has been on antibiotics. For the past 2 weeks, he's been having a minimum of 2L of Orange Juice before bed hoping the extra vitamin C will help him. Just OJ, no water, no tea. Just OJ. On Friday, for some reason, Moishii's brother drank 4L of Apple juice and 3L of OJ. Thats 7L of juice! He was thinking all that juice was helping him recover! And he was always thirsty, thinking it was the antibiotics. So he just kept drinking juice. That is until Saturday when he found that his vision had started blurring. So they take him to the doctors and when he explained to the doctor what he's been doing, he doctor screamed out "OMG WE HAVE TO GET YOU TO A HOSPITAL BEFORE YOU GOING INTO A COMA!!!".
Apparently his juice drinking bought his blood sugar level from a normal 10 to 48. 48!!!!!!!!!!! Thats 5 times the frickin blood sugar level! I'm surprised it wasn't higher considering he had 7L of juice! SEVEN LITRES!!! YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE SEVEN LITRES OF WATER! He literally overdosed on Orange juice! How do you explain that to you friends?
"Hey whatcha up to?"
"Oh, I'm in hospital..."
"Hospital?? OMG!! WHAT HAPPENED?"
"I overdosed on orange juice"
"......."
"....."
Or maybe......
"Hey guess what happened to me on the weekend? I had a near death experience"
"Near death experience? What happened? Were you driving? In a fire?"
"No.....I overdosed on Orange Juice."
"......."
"....."
As Moishii was telling me this story over the phone, I practically bit my lips off from trying not to laugh. I was wrong to laugh! I tried not to laugh but it wasn't working, and Moishii knew it. Thats when he said "Go ahead, I've already had my laughing fit" and then I lost it. I laughed and laughed and cried and laughed and then laughed some more. I started to get hysterical and started screaming at Moishii
Me: "WHO THE HELL OVERDOSES ON ORANGE JUICE!?"
Him: "My brother obviously!!!"
Me: "Your family ain't normal are they?"
Him: "No."
Seriously. Who in their right mind overdoses on Orange Juice? And no wonder he was always thirsty! He was having a kilo of sugar a day! If you're thirsty, you have WATER! NOT JUICE! JUICE IS SUGAR AND SUGAR MAKES YOU THIRSTY!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA How Moishii managed to keep a straight face infront of the doctor I'll never understand...... HAHAHAAHAHHAHAHA I'm sorry. I'll stop laughing now.
....
......
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Now what would you award someone who was CLOSE to doing that? You know how you hear all those tragic stories of people getting hit by a bus, or a car flies off the roof of a 3 story car park and comes crashing down? What about those stories of people eating at some unhygenic restaurant and gets food poisoning? Frostbite? Heart attack? Stroke? Breaking a leg in 3 places in a freak football accident?
I got an SMS from Moishii on Saturday. I had called him earlier and he didn't answer his mobile, so I had expected the sms to be something along the lines of "I'm watching a movie, call you later". No. "Im at the hospital my brother overdosed on OJ. I'll call you later".
what the? OJ?
I quickly type a reply "OJ = Orange juice!?"
I didn't get a reply for awhile and I started to get a bit worried. I'm sure you can't overdose on OJ. OJ must be some sort of disease, condition or accident abbreviation. I get a call a bit later from Moishii. Basically this is what had happened:
Moishii's brother has been suffering from bronchitis for the past month and has been on antibiotics. For the past 2 weeks, he's been having a minimum of 2L of Orange Juice before bed hoping the extra vitamin C will help him. Just OJ, no water, no tea. Just OJ. On Friday, for some reason, Moishii's brother drank 4L of Apple juice and 3L of OJ. Thats 7L of juice! He was thinking all that juice was helping him recover! And he was always thirsty, thinking it was the antibiotics. So he just kept drinking juice. That is until Saturday when he found that his vision had started blurring. So they take him to the doctors and when he explained to the doctor what he's been doing, he doctor screamed out "OMG WE HAVE TO GET YOU TO A HOSPITAL BEFORE YOU GOING INTO A COMA!!!".
Apparently his juice drinking bought his blood sugar level from a normal 10 to 48. 48!!!!!!!!!!! Thats 5 times the frickin blood sugar level! I'm surprised it wasn't higher considering he had 7L of juice! SEVEN LITRES!!! YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE SEVEN LITRES OF WATER! He literally overdosed on Orange juice! How do you explain that to you friends?
"Hey whatcha up to?"
"Oh, I'm in hospital..."
"Hospital?? OMG!! WHAT HAPPENED?"
"I overdosed on orange juice"
"......."
"....."
Or maybe......
"Hey guess what happened to me on the weekend? I had a near death experience"
"Near death experience? What happened? Were you driving? In a fire?"
"No.....I overdosed on Orange Juice."
"......."
"....."
As Moishii was telling me this story over the phone, I practically bit my lips off from trying not to laugh. I was wrong to laugh! I tried not to laugh but it wasn't working, and Moishii knew it. Thats when he said "Go ahead, I've already had my laughing fit" and then I lost it. I laughed and laughed and cried and laughed and then laughed some more. I started to get hysterical and started screaming at Moishii
Me: "WHO THE HELL OVERDOSES ON ORANGE JUICE!?"
Him: "My brother obviously!!!"
Me: "Your family ain't normal are they?"
Him: "No."
Seriously. Who in their right mind overdoses on Orange Juice? And no wonder he was always thirsty! He was having a kilo of sugar a day! If you're thirsty, you have WATER! NOT JUICE! JUICE IS SUGAR AND SUGAR MAKES YOU THIRSTY!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA How Moishii managed to keep a straight face infront of the doctor I'll never understand...... HAHAHAAHAHHAHAHA I'm sorry. I'll stop laughing now.
....
......
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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