Day 13 - Milan, Verona and Venice

After the relaxing 7:30am wake up call today, we were rudely awaken at 6am with the telephone going off like crazy. We drag ourselves to breakfast where we grabbed an empty table by the window to enjoy the view for the last day. Suddenly Carl and Irene rocked up to sit with us. Basically she looks like Irene from Home and Away, and he looks like Carl from Neighbours. God I miss TV so much. Just then, Camera Susan and her daughter Rachel walk in, and one of the only spare seats left was with Good Old and Ron. But after the tiff at San Gimignano, she basically refused to sit with them. They caused a massive fuss getting people to move and squeeze them onto a table etc. God its too early in the morning for this. Plus Irene and Carl aren't the most talkative or interesting people. Breakfast was, how would you say it....awkward and boring?

We quickly scoffed and left to finish our packing before we hopped onto the bus for the next city, Milan. Now, a few days back, we had been given a list of optional tours we can sign up for. Before we booked, we agreed that we were going to sign up for 2 tours only. Somehow, we ended up signing up for 5 tours altogether. (You should all know by now we don't stick to our plans). So it was time to cough up the money, and Cabbage Patch was walking up and down the bus collecting the money as we were driving towards Milan. As she walks up to us, suddenly Rene ran up to Cabbage Patch, whispered something whilst swearing and the both of them bolted down the aisle of the Bus whilst Prison Break Chick jumps up onto her seat and practically climbs back into her parent's seats. Apparently Nita, the Indian Italian, had passed out and then thrown up. Her Hubby ran down the aisle to look after her when he found out.

Cabbage Patch, immediately dumped Nita with her Husband and ran to the front of the bus. At first, I thought she was going to get Umberto to stop the bus. Instead, she grabbed the microphone and went "Now I need to tell you something about Milan..." and started rattling off facts and figures about Milan! For crying out loud woman! You've got an unconcious person on your tour bus! And you're a tour director! Shouldn't you atleast check that she's not dead? Suddenly, something happened around the vomiting area, I think she basically vomitted again. So Cabbage Patch dropped her microphone and ran back to the chaotic scene of vomit. It was at this time that Good Old started arguing with Diane as to the best way to look after the vomitter, whether to give her water or air or smelling salts of some form. This is when Good Old screams that she faints all the time and has experience in fainting and she should know how to look after the vomitter. Suddenly, Good Old jumps out of her seat, steps all over the vomit to look after the vomitter. Somehow, Good Old got left with cleaning up the vomit, as Cabbage Patch runs back to the front of the bus and grabs the microphone to scream "Now I've REALLY got to tell you something about Milan". For crying out loud! No one is listening to what you have to tell us about Milan! I honestly don't remember a word she was saying considering you had someone PASSED OUT on the bus and Good Old dancing around in the vomit. This is NOT THE RIGHT TIME TO START TELLING US SOMETHING ABOUT MILAN!!!!!!!

The bus finally pulls to a stop and we all pile out except the 2 Indian Italians. They bustled the vomiter to the back of the bus where she could lie down and not have to listen to things about Milan.


We all followed Cabbage Patch through the back streets where we ended up at Via Emmanuale. This is where all the expensive shops are, including a very big Prada store. The group split up and we immediately went into the Duomo to take photos.

Via Emmanuale

The outside

The Duomo

You can also go to the roof for pictures, but we figured it was too much of a hike for the hour we're there for, and since we're going to be back in Milan in a weeks time, we'll save that for our second visit. We walked around a bit to take photos and do some random shopping before we stopped for a coffee break and crossiant.


We quickly did a pit stop at the loo when Moishii screams he needs to buy water. I leave him in the shop to buy water as I walk to the stalls outside to do a bit of souvenier shopping. 15mins later, Moishii FINALLY emerges from the shop with his tiny bottle of water. My god! How long does it take to buy water!! Some people.

We decided to go back to the meeting point where I spot a beagle the same time Ron did. We both went running up to take a photo of the dog for Good Old, who was missing.



After awhile, Good Old finally showed up, shaking and out of breath carrying a MASSIVE Prada bag. (She apparently got lost after coming out from Prada). Apparently Prada was on sale and everything was a bargain in there. When we asked what was the sale like, she ummed and ahhed for awhile and starting telling us how its 20% off and its a great sale compared to the US rar rar. It took us a few minutes to get out of her that it cost her 358euros for 2 pairs of shoes......I guess to some, that is a bargain...Meanwhile, Ron presented her with a big Sunflower as its their Wedding anniversary tomorrow. Awwwww how sweet! And I assume the 358euros worth of shoes will now be considered a present.

Milan seems to be bringing the love out...

Meanwhile, Skeletor and her husband was still missing. Everyone stood around in the blazing hot sun waiting for them, when 10mins later, they finally appeared. Apparently they got lost as well. How on earth do you get lost between Via Emmanuale and the Duomo? Its like saying you're at Circular Quay and you couldn't find the Opera House. Wait, its like you're at Opera Bar and couldn't find the Opera house. They're literally right next to each other!

Now that we had everyone, we headed back towards the bus where we found the Vomiter lying at the back of the bus looking a bit better. I offered her my motion sickness tablets, but apparently thats what caused her to pass out. Ok...

Next stop, Verona. Again, we're dropped off in a back street where we wind our way through the streets. Because of the traffic jam going into and out of Milan, we had an hour in Verona to sight see and eat. Following Cabbage Patch's instructions, we rushed through the crowd to the Ampitheatre to grab a quick photo.


Then we rushed through the crowd to Herb Square to look for food.

More wine for us!!

Whilst Good Old and Ron were wining and dining, and Clawfeet and Colgate were wining and dining, we ended up buying a calzone from a stall at the square and squatting on the streets to eat. This is our wining and dining...how depressing.

My Calzone

We decided to cheer ourselves up by grabbing another coffee before we hit the shops. We grabbed more wine (of course) and a few Litres of water when we decided on buying a small figurine of Romeo and Juliet as an anniversary gift for Good Old and Ron.

Now that we had everything, it was time to go back to the meeting point. Not before stopping by Juliets balcony and touching her boobs! We arrive at the entrance to the balcony and there is a HUGEEEEE crowd. Apparently a group of students had rocked up at the stage. By this time, we're tired and cranky, and we get NASTY when we're cranky. We (me in front to clear the way) basically elbowed our way through the crowd and jumped the queue to get a photo with Juliet's balcony and also to rub her boobs for good luck!

Juliet's balcony

Rubbing Juliet's boobs for luck

It was then off to the meeting spot again where we are bundled onto the bus to go to Venice. It was going to be a long ride, which was ok as we amused ourselves with a laughing fit when we noticed Good Old's Prada bag sitting in the overhead shelf. The only thing it, with the rattling of the bus, it looks like the bag was going to fall out and fall directly onto Tammi's head! After our laughing fit, we basically passed out until we got to Venice where we had to park at the outskirts to wait for a permit to even enter the city.

Because of the way Venice is built, its basically a no car zone, so we had no chance in hell to get to the hotel with a bus. We get dropped off in the outskirts of Venice, where we had to take all our hand luggage and drag everything half way across the city to get to our hotel. When we finally get there, everyone is completely out of breath. The good this is I had packed my hand luggage into my suitcase (smart packing) which Umberto was taking to the hotel for us. All I had to do was carry the water whilst everyone else struggled with all their hand luggage.

We get to the hotel and get allocated our room, which was on the ground floor and basically had a view of a shed and storage area as well as a tiny ass bathroom. We did our usual, take photos of the hotel room thing when suddenly the phone rings. Moishii answers and then hangs up soon afterwards to tell me we're getting moved to another room. Apparently someone on our tour needs a ground floor room so they don't have to walk the stairs. This meant it was the 81yos, which we didn't mind swapping. But it was a pain in the ass since we had dumped our stuff and gotten comfortable. Little did we know it was actually Camera Susan and her daughter. For crying out loud, how hard is it to walk one flight of stairs up? AND there's elevators as well! Bleh.

We get to our new room, which is actually more spacious, and you get an up high view of the courtyard. The door doesn't shut very well and you have to ram your shoulder against it, which wasn't too bad. Moishii decided to have a shower whilst we waited for the suitcases to arrive and I find a few coins from petty cash to tip the guy. The door knocks and I open it only to have the porter practically run me over with the suitcase. He shoves the suitcase at me and storms out before I could tip, and because the door jammed a bit, I ended up slamming the door shut behind him. Moishii comes storming out to see what all the fuss is thinking I got into a fight with someone.

Since the suitcase is delivered, I thought I should grab a quick shower as well. The minute I walk in, I practically slip and crack my head open. The ENTIRE floor is wet. Not just splotches of water, but FLOODED wet. I grabbed the bath mat and hand towels and throw them down on the floor to minimise the flooding. I jump into the shower, and as I'm showering, I can see a "shimmering" thing on the glass shower door. I thought it was a reflecting of the water that was building up in the shower. (Basically 2mins into the shower, the water had backed up to my ankles) I ignored it and continued showering. As I open the shower door, I realised the "shimmering" thing I saw, was the water leaking out from under the door. There's basically no seal around the shower, so water was just gushing out. And to make things worse, because the water wasn't draining properly, theres even more water gushing out. By the time I'm done showering, the water had leaked out of the shower, soaked through all the hand towels and started snaking its way along the walls and threatening to spill into the hotel room itself. I grabbed the very last towel I could find, and used it as a barrier to stop the water leaking into our room.

Finally we went back to the lobby where we were meeting up for our gondola ride. I told Moishii that I'm going to get the 2 best seats on the Gondola and told him to follow my lead. I wrangled my way through the crowd and managed to slip myself into the queue where we're almost guaranteed to be the first people onto the Gondola. First come first serve, and we get great seats!

The Gondola ride was so calming. To slowly float through the canals of Venice, go from their bustling "free way" into the narrow "side streets" and seeing a boat "parked" at the back of the house like a garage. Its so like our world, but so different at the same time. I know alot of tourists who try to organise their own Gondola ride end up getting ripped off and pay about 90euros a ride. If it had been us, I'm *pretty sure* that we wouldn't fork out that money. (But knowing us, we would be drunk and pay them the 90 plus a tip) and alot of people have missed out on a Gondola ride because of the price. If you get a chance, definately do the ride. Its the only real way to truely appreciate Venice.

Will and Diane - I really really love this photo I took of them!

After the ride, we get dropped off at the hotel again, where its relaxation time before dinner. We eventually strolled down to dinner, where we get yelled at for rocking up too early. So the whole tour group is standing outside the dining room when they finally opened it up 5mins later. We grab a seat only to have Clawfeet and Colgate join us. The waiter comes over and tries to convince us to pay 3times the price for alcohol. Of course we declined, but since Clawfeet and Colgate like to wine and dine, they went for the alcohol.

The food was quite nice, the pasta was obviously delicious, but I was a bit disappointed to get meat and veg like you would find at an RSL. The tiramisu was really good as well.



After dinner, we decided to take a stroll through Venice at night (instead of paying Cabbage Patch 35euros each for her to take us around) and immediately, we hit the shops. The one thing you MUST do when in Venice, is to buy glass. What glass? Anything glass! Necklaces, cups, plates, jewellery boxes, earrings, rings, vases and even flowers! And the Venetian Masks! Its a Kaleidoscope of colours and sparkle no matter where you look. I was going to wait til the next day to start shopping, but I couldn't help myself! Moishii had to run back half way to get more money for shopping.



Good thing the shops close fairly early (around 9pm) so we hit the bottle shop where we opted for a small bottle of wine, but then I picked up a bottle of small Bellini for myself as well. Moishii, not wanting to be left out, got himself a small bottle of Jack Daniels.

We get back to the hotel and immediately tried to open the wine bottle. For some reason, this triggered a laughing fit for me, and I couldn't hold onto the bottle. It took us a good 10mins to open the bottle, but that time, I was a heap on the floor laughing my head off. I swear it wasn't the bellini hitting me. Hey, I even managed to rewrap Ron and Good Old's anniversary present, which was given to us like this!


As we're doing our nightly recap into our diaries and getting completely shitfaced, when I noticed that there was a mat on the floor. I asked Moishii whether he had put the mat on the floor and where did he get it. Apparently he thought I put the mats on the floor (we had one each). When he came back to get money, the curtains were drawn, the blankets folded back and mats were on the floor. Wow, they fold down the beds for you! I've never been to a hotel that did that before.

Next thing you know, We hear this pounding on next door's door and someone screaming "Patrick?? Patrickkkkkk!". Of course the both of us started screaming "Christine?? CHRISTINEEEEEEE!!". I think the guy left pretty quickly after that. This is when I turned to Moishii and went:

Me: "Hey...."
Him: "Yeh?"
Me: "I need to tell you something about Milan!"

This trigger a laughing fit that went on for way to long. I think my kidney starting hurting after the 20th "I need to tell you something about Milan!".